#SnoTapScramble

There I was sitting in the waiting room of a Ford dealership in the Fox Valley, patiently awaiting the birth of four new Goodyear tires.  After the $5 crossword puzzle I picked up from the local Kwik Trip expended only 10 minutes of my self-diagnosed ADHD complex, and no winnings to boot, my fleeting attention turned to a Golf Digest mag.  With a round merely 16 hours earlier at Thornberry Creek in scenic Hobart, WI  fresh on my mind there was a desperate interest to find any tips that might combat a wayward driver and a miserable putter.

See where Paulina fits into my #SnoTapScramble.

For a timetable of the magazine issue, what I found was an Q & A with Dustin Johnson only months after his 2010 PGA Championship debacle at Whistling Straits, and a graphic about hypothetical foursomes which piqued my interest.  We've all been asked that question in our lives, "If you could invite three people to dinner, living or dead, who would it be and why?" The thought process is usually a psychology experiment in itself, but the results are conversation provoking to be sure.  Now make it a foursome playing 18 holes and likely you've struck a chord with anyone who's ever attempted to mock the game as I do on an annual basis during the summer months.

Naturally, I wanted to hear the thoughts of SnoTap colleagues so I took to Twitter, and they did not disappoint:

Bryan Reynolds ‏@bryguyreynolds

2h

@Patrick_Luce alright, I would take @notthefakeSVP, @AaronRodgers12, and Steve Carrell. #snotapscramble

Charlie Tritschler ‏@SnoTap122h

@Patrick_Luce Such a tough question: Athletes/Coaches: Rodgers, Favre & Buzz Williams #SnoTapScramble

Charlie Tritschler ‏@SnoTap122h

@Patrick_Luce Non athletes: Bill Simmons, El Pres and Dan Patrick. All three men I think very highly of. #SnoTapScramble

Bryan, our resident golf savant, came up with a solid group, one that I think would be a riot on the course. Chief on the other hand had his head explode trying to decide and honestly, I'm probably 14 times worse at making decisions than he is. The groups he envisioned though had me giving a golf clap all around. I even buzzed the idea of going Death Match style and tagging Packers GM Ted Thompson in for Marquette's Buzz Williams. Not sure who rides with who in which cart in that scenario.  Can't imagine the conversation or the silence. Tension times a million.

But, that brings me to my foursome.  Generally, I'd throw in a dead guy like President Lincoln, but I think to make it relevant it's gotta be someone living. Here goes:

Bill Clinton

Bill can swing.

Trust me, I've got some pretty intruding questions for our nation's 42nd President. Not to mention the golf course offers certain connotations rated-R, that would make conversation with William Jefferson a ripe one.  I know, I know my Republican constituent might not agree with this pick, but I didn't choose him for his political background.  If you're telling me he wouldn't be a riot for a round of golf, then I don't trust you. I'd make a case he's the reason we have swag in America.

Sauce hands.

Wayne Gretzky

The "Great One" isn't shy about swingin' the sticks either. He's the reason I played hockey, and still enjoy it today.  Wayne was so smooth with a stick in his hands so I'm guaranteeing that translates to the golf game. Throw in the fact that his daughter Paulina, a SnoTap favorite, frequents the golf course with her previously mentioned boyfriend, Dustin Johnson, and a round of golf with Wayne offers more conversation than a round would allow.  I'm thinking Paulina would be the fantasy beverage cart girl. 

Bill Murray

How's this for comic relief?

I bet you were thinking I'd take Michael Jordan here to round out an "All-Stogie" foursome, but instead I take my favorite comedian of all-time and an appropriate popular golf figure because of his role as Carl Spackler in Caddyshack.  If you need further explanation of why I select Bill, just Google image "Bill Murray golf." It doesn't disappoint. I take Bill simply because he'd do just as much joking with Clinton and Gretzky as I would, and we'd probably have a similar score to boot.  I'm also setting the over/under at 37 as to how many times we recite his famous quote: 

"So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the 18th and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice."

Feel free to hit us with your fearsome foursomes. 

Luce Cannon

@Patrick_Luce